As a mum, a business owner, a wife, a daughter, you know ~ all the things (all those hats we wear day to day) it can often be the case that there’s always something to do for other people. One day this got me mulling today the concept that we often view the things that we do for ourselves as “selfish” or is it that it has been indoctrinated into us that we should view it as selfish with the continuous conversation that “self care isn’t selfish” and the feelings that mums often have in that anything that they do sans children will be deemed as selfish.
What does selfish actually mean?
I have intentionally not googled the dictionary definition of this as I wanted to go with my gut. I would say that selfish is to do something that not only is all about you but that adversely impacts another. Would you agree?
I think the key for me lies with the “adversely impacts another.”
You doing stuff that makes you feel happy probably doesn’t adversely impact another. I’d say that 99% of the time others will either be neutral or benefit from you being able to be refreshed, replenished and feeling a little more epic.
(** note the stuff that makes up the 1% would probably be stuff you’d not do anyway**).
I think that taking a fuller view of selfish means that your niggle in your head can’t live alongside the fact that selfish IS NOT JUST DOING SOMETHING FOR SELF!
I go for a run – I’m a more tolerant parent, I’m more creative, I have more energy = everyone wins.
I go soak in the bath – I’m more relaxed and therefore a more tolerant parent, I have sparks of ideas, I get to decompress.
I go out for a while – ^^ all of the above.
None of these actions are selfish.
Just one to ponder on today
